


get off free.

by Ioveletters (gingermina)



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Criminals, Angst, Crimes & Criminals, F/F, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Murder, Serial Killers, Smut, killerau
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 16:33:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20429027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingermina/pseuds/Ioveletters
Summary: placing the bloodied knife down onto the oak table, chaeyoung blinks once, taking a deep breath in.well, fuck.





	get off free.

**Author's Note:**

> chaehyo (original) version.

_march twenty-eighth, twenty-nineteen._  
_dunchon-dong, seoul, south korea._  
_2:27 am._  
  
there's a sudden rush of cool air brushing over her heated body, a drop in her stomach, and pressure being lifted from off her shoulders.

placing the bloodied knife down onto the oak table, chaeyoung blinks once, taking a deep breath in.  
  
well fuck.

the last straw had probably been when he compared her to her mother. it's one thing to mention the deceased woman, but to compare her? no, that wouldn't work.   
  
he stumbled in through the red door, words slurring together as he begins to belittle chaeyoung. it doesn't bother her if she's being honest; she's gotten very, very used to it. it's amusing that he continues to let his life spiral out of control like this after her mother's passing, so amusing that he'd rather go out and waste his money on drinks and maybe a couple cigars here and there than to spend money on rent or his children.  
  
she hadn't really planned this, but just in case, she had told jeonghoon to stay with his aunt for a while. she didn't specify that a while meant until he was eighteen. he couldn't be spotted with chaeyoung if she did what she was planning to do. no, she was going to be chased down and hunted like some animal for the rest of her life. or at least until they finally catch her.

and her father had never laid a hand on her in that way, never physically abused her, only spat vicious words at her and her brother. but it was tiring, and chaeyoung knew she couldn't let them continue to live like this.  
  
so she did the most logical thing she could think of in that moment as soon as he growled, steps messy as he rushes to grab chaeyoung by the throat. she's always been quick, so with absolutely no remorse, she exhales, twisting and grabbing the ugly orange knife from the table before plunging it right below his intestines. it's a disgusting sound, the one that rips away from his throat, and he fucking reeks as he slacks onto chaeyoung's shoulder. he isn't dead yet, of course not, so she cringes, pulling the knife back out and pushing his drunken body up to slice across his windpipe in one fluid motion.

it's revolting, but she can only push him back down onto the floor at this point, watching his body slowly losing life. she decides to steal a pack of cigarettes from his drawer, a couple juice boxes, and a notepad after she's changed and before she's left the house, leaving the door wide open. she doesn't even bother to hide the evidence; they'll find her eventually anyways.

_march twenty-eighth, twenty-nineteen._  
_dongdaemun-gu, south korea._  
_5:01 am._  
  
she had asked someone to drive her to dong-daemun-gu after about an hour of roaming the streets. he was a perverted older man, and he smelled of ashes and stupid, gross hot dogs. it worked though, and she only had to pay him 5,686 won.  
  
(she got the 5,686 won back after knocking the man out).

_march twenty-ninth, twenty-nineteen._   
_guri-si, south korea._   
_6:13 pm._

she couldn't stay in dongdaemun-gu as long as she wanted not even at jungnang-gu, not when there's already been several news reports and spottings of her leaving the home. she dyed her hair, went blonde because she's always wanted to do that, and decided to change her style of clothing. she bought a couple makeup products just to make shit easier, deciding to cover up her mole beneath her lip. it worked, she guesses, because no one's giving her strange looks anymore.  
  
it makes her feel a bit sick that she's become a killer and that jeonghoon probably knows about everything. not even probably, he definitely does.   
  
she ends up throwing up her stolen lunch by the side of the river.

she's been sneaking into hotel rooms with stolen cards when no one's paying attention, and been snatching small little food items from vendors out on the streets near the hangang river park. it's pretty here, and she really wishes she could stay longer. maybe she could have once she finished college, but that's all gone to shit now. she'll never be able to rest until she makes it to maybe america. even then she's fucked.  
  
she's got one of her dad's cigarettes resting between her lips at about eight at night, absentmindedly drawing onto the notepad every now and then. she swears beneath her breath when the ash falls onto the paper, burning an ugly hole through the left upper corner. she's annoyed then, simply flicking the cigarette down into a water puddle before coughing violently. 

there's a woman standing above her, short dark hair framing her face quite nicely. she tilts her head, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear before smiling, "you're good at it."  
  
"at?" chaeyoung hums. she knows exactly what she's good at, but she wants to hear it. besides, getting directly complimented by a pretty girl? it almost makes her heart jump back to life.   
  
"dirtying the environment."  
  
chaeyoung furrows her brows, her stomach twisting in an uncomfortable way. who the fuck does she think she is?

"not like you really give a fuck." chaeyoung kind of cares about the environment too, but she's not gonna admit that. it's weak as hell and really dumb.  
  
"you've got a mouth on you," the woman cringes visibly, "i was simply gonna ask you to pick it up and throw it away properly. and maybe i'll buy you food. you look like you could use it."  
  
"what, always buy strangers food?"  
  
"only the nice ones. pick the cigarette up."  
  
"it's fucking wet!"   
  
in conclusion, chaeyoung ends up picking the cigarette up. it wasn't her fault her stomach growled! she threw up all her food from earlier anyway, so she could use the extra food. the woman's name is jihyo. that's all she'd say, but that doesn't really matter. she only simply told her that her name was chae. no young, no son. jihyo hadn't questioned it further, only sipped on her strawberry milkshake a bit more often.  
  
the vanilla one probably doesn't taste as good as the strawberry, but she isn't about to ask jihyo to taste hers.  
  
jihyo doesn't even fucking pay, simply walks out with a cocky smirk and a wave to the woman standing in the doorway to the kitchen. chaeyoung hears a shout, and suddenly jihyo's grabbing onto her jacket harshly with a raspy, "go, dumbass!"  
  
they run until they reach gangbyeonbuk-ro, only occasionally stopping for rest. by the time jihyo exhales heavily, chest heaving and face red, slacking down against an empty railroad car, chaeyoung's entire body feels as if its burning. she had definitely ran off her food, and she could already feel her stomach beginning to eat itself again, but at least she's even further.   
  
why the fuck did jihyo even want chaeyoung to run with her anyway? it already wasn't making any sense, but hey, if it meant she could survive, she'd do it ten thousand times over.

_march thirtieth, twenty-nineteen.  
_ _jangmok-myeon, geoje-si, gyeongsangnam-do, south korea.  
_ _7:54 am._

chaeyoung wakes up inside one of the railroad cars, the loud sound of a train violently pounding in her ears. her head feels as if it's going to burst, pressure slowly building while her vision's doing its very best to clear. she spots a figure beside her. it's curled up into a little ball, very shirtless, and from the soft honey scent, chaeyoung assumes it's jihyo. she sits up, rubbing at her eyes roughly before groaning and sitting back up against a stack of boxes.   
  
what the fuck even happened?  
  
she grabs her backpack, searching through each and every zipper and pouch before panic begins to settle in. she glances at a sign, just barely making out the fact they're in fucking yucheon-ri. she's already quite a long ways from seoul and it's only been, what, maybe a day? no, two. was it a week? that wouldn't make sense. 

she shakes jihyo's slack body until she groans, swearing under her breath, "the fuck do you want?"  
  
"i lost my fucking money," chaeyoung deadpans, checking one more time. jihyo sits up after she's done, reaching out for her dirtied white top, "the fuck am i gonna do? this is your fucking fault!"  
  
"chill," jihyo mumbles, yawning, "'s not like we haven't been stealing things anyways. now guess what?"  
  
"what?" she grumbles, tossing her backpack to her right.  
  
"we steal money, genius."  
  
jihyo is a bad fucking influence, much different than chaeyoung anticipated she'd be. and if jihyo is a criminal and chaeyoung's a killer, maybe this would work out really well.

_april third, twenty-nineteen._   
_jangmok-myeon, geoje-si, gyeongsangnam-do, south korea._   
_3:19 pm._

they found a little area of smaller, fancier shops that are absolutely fucking filled with security, but that just makes jihyo more excited.   
  
she likes the thrill apparently, and despite chaeyoung's nerves screaming at her to make her stop, she goes along with it. she's already in enough trouble, but might as well make her time in prison a bit more worth it, yeah?  
  
they end up stealing only a couple outfits that easily cost-  
  
we'll say a lot of money because that's all chaeyoung can think of.

exactly seven minutes later, jihyo's dressed in such an intimidating way chaeyoung fucking chokes on her juice.  
  
she also ends up throwing up because maybe, just maybe, she isn't very used to this much physical activity, plus having to run right after eating each and every single time? it's not good. but it could possibly be worth it, chaeyoung thinks, because she likes the way jihyo holds her hair back and rubs at her back until she's done, and she likes the way jihyo offers to steal a bottle of water every time. it kind of shows she cares in a way, and chaeyoung really isn't used to that. it's good.

exploit the weakness.

if jihyo wants to care, that isn't chaeyoung's fault. if anything, it makes it a bit easier to get rid of her in the end. if she cares, she's nothing but a pathetic little toy that chaeyoung can toy with anyways.  
  
and yet she can't seem to bring herself to cut jihyo off, quite literally, when she's staring at her resting inside another railroad car. jihyo looks innocent when she's just simply breathing, like she's some precious little girl that chaeyoung would be friends with in grade school. but she's bad, very bad, and she kind of wonders if everyone sees chaeyoung as an innocent little girl too.  
  
she groans, stomach twisting. 

she doesn't even know where the hell she wants to end up right now. she's sure as fuck not gonna be able to sneak off to another country just yet, not for a long time, but she can't stay in south korea. she thinks she wants to get caught maybe. then she wouldn't have to deal with running and stealing and living with another person. not even living, she's just with her. she pauses in her thoughts, eyeing jihyo once more.  
  
were they partners?  
  
an idea comes to mind that chaeyoung really, _really_ likes. maybe she could make jihyo fall for her? then she really would be a pet to chaeyoung. but how would that work? chaeyoung's never done too well at the sight of tears, but lately she hasn't found much feeling residing in her at all.  
  
"feel fine?" jihyo questions. chaeyoung nods.

_april fifth, twenty-nineteen.  
nongok-ri. gokseong, south korea.  
_ _6:00 am._

sleep isn't coming easy whatsoever. especially not when guilt eats at her constantly and she never gets a break from the sight of jihyo's bruises painting along her wrists and neck, and she really doesn't like the dark bruise on her cheek. admittedly it was not her fault. sure jihyo doesn't know any better, but fuck. chaeyoung is not at fault. she reacted reasonably, she did it for a reason.   
  
keep telling yourself that and maybe you'll believe it.  
  
_jihyo had lazily came up to her last night, eyes glassy and breath smelling of alcohol, words slurring together, "the fuck'd you follow me for?" chaeyoung frowns, eyebrows furrowing together. she can feel the panic beginning to set in, heart racing and beads of sweat forming on her skin. she takes a deep breath in; no sign of weakness can be shown. then jihyo would know.   
  
there's still loud music from inside of the club they tried sneaking into and the cold air should be helping her burning skin, but it isn't and jihyo just keeps staring at her like she wants an answer, but chaeyoung doesn't have it. no one's ever reasonable when they're drunk, so she wouldn't understand if chaeyoung told her that jihyo made her come.  
  
"are you drunk, jihyo?"   
  
"no 'm not fuckin' drunk," she hums, resting the side of her face against the blue dumpster. chaeyoung recoils, but keeps her distance. the last time she allowed herself to get close to someone like this, they ended up dead. "why are you flinching? scared?"  
  
dead, dead, dead, she's a killer. why is she a killer? she isn't supposed to be, why did she do that? she's only nineteen and she's already fucked up.   
  
the thoughts are persistent lately.  
  
"i'm not scared," chaeyoung laughs, replacing the panic with a searing feeling that bites away at her insides, "why the fuck would i ever be scared of you?"  
  
"'s cute. y'know, i know what you did," she shivers and jihyo finally straightens herself the best she can, wobbling over to chaeyoung. she backs up, rolling her eyes, but she finds herself hitting the back of a grey brick wall and the panic is back just as quick as it left, "killed your dad 'cause he drank a lot. does me drinking scare you, chae?"  
  
she keeps quiet, hands beginning to tremble then because jihyo is still fucking walking and she can only push herself so far into the wall and she knows, why does she know? stay calm, stay calm, she's drunk, she doesn't really know. she's saying shit to get you riled up, you're fine. it's not working.  
  
"kill me like you killed him," it isn't even a question, more of a demand, and then she's right in front of her, hot breath hitting her lips and hands digging into her sides, "could turn you in if i wanted to, so might wanna hurry."  
  
"wouldn't because then you'd be alone." she swallows.  
  
"i've been alone for a while, what's your point?" jihyo smiles, backing up and holding up chaeyoung's orange knife, "now look at what i've got. gonna do anything about it? no? you're so pathetic. can kill your own father but can't kill some girl you met a few days ago."  
  
the blood drains from her face, and then she's grabbing jihyo's throat, right leg hooking behind her knees and she's colliding with the ground, hard and wet and she swears she scrapes her knee against the side of the water puddle, but she'll worry about that later. no more panic, no more anger, no more fear, and she's empty as she lands a very solid hit to jihyo's face. just a couple more to her sides, knuckles aching from the impacts, and lip burning from the teeth currently sinking into it. jihyo keeps quiet, doesn't even fight back, and chaeyoung nearly considers taking pity on her. but she can't trust jihyo, she knows too fucking much, so she presses the knife against her throat with a single eyebrow raised.  
  
"do not, and i will not repeat this, fuck with me."   
  
jihyo rolls her eyes, scoffing, but there's still a silent agreement between them._

chaeyoung doesn't like when she can't feel because she does mean things to jihyo. but jihyo provokes her and there's not much she can do because she isn't used to having patience when she knows she can get rid of the problem much easier than waiting now.  
  
why does she care if she does mean things to jihyo? she's a killer, might as well get used to it.  
_  
april fifth, twenty-nineteen.  
__nongok-ri. gokseong, south korea.  
__9:50 am._

they hotwire a car, immediately speeding off recklessly into the empty roads of nongok-ri. chaeyoung didn't really want to get them killed just yet, so she simply lets jihyo drive once she's finished fucking around with the wires and has broken the wheel. it's an older car and she's kind of scared it'll break down before they even make it out of nongok-ri, but it sounds fine and it has plenty of gas so far, so she thinks they lucked out.  
  
it's silent most of the time, even when chaeyoung reaches into her backpack to grab a gaeran tost-u for the both of them. she hasn't apologized yet and she really doesn't plan to, but jihyo seems sad. she doesn't think jihyo can get sad actually. she's good at being happy most of the time.   
  
when chaeyoung brings out her juicebox, sipping it quietly, jihyo snorts.   
  
"what?"  
  
"nothing. you look cute."   
  
she huffs, setting her juicebox down into the cupholder, "do you remember anything about last night?"  
  
"not really, why?"  
  
"so you don't remember how you got the bruises and shit?"   
  
jihyo shrugs, shaking her head, and chaeyoung sighs. she could tell the truth, but what would happen then?   
  
"how can you trust i'm not gonna turn you in?" she changes the topic quickly, adjusting her position so that her feet are placed on the dashboard.   
  
"because you've done the same fucked up shit, yeah?" she replies easily. slamming onto the breaks aggressively. chaeyoung flies forward, hands scrambling to reach out for anything. jihyo laughs beneath her breath, "maybe if you were wearing your seatbelt."  
  
"you never told me to!"  
  
"what, need a reminder?" chaeyoung ends up cussing jihyo out before getting out of the car and walking into another clothing store.  
  
she wonders how they haven't noticed she's son chaeyoung just yet. even if she covers her mole and dyes her hair, she still looks the same. maybe people are just that dumb? she hopes so. she finds a rather pretty dress she thinks jihyo might like. it's only simply black, but chaeyoung thinks it would look pretty on her. so she waits until the tailor turns his back to grab it and walk out the glass doors.   
  
she finds jihyo sitting outside in the car, door open and feet propped up against it as she scrolls mindlessly through her cellphone. it's nearly dead, and she hasn't found a plugin just yet, and she definitely needs a shower. they both do.  
  
chaeyoung shoves the dress into jihyo's arms, shrugging when jihyo looks up at her with surprised eyes, "thought you'd like it or whatever."  
  
she thanks her with a soft smile and chaeyoung fucking hates the way her heart clenches at the sight.  
  
_april fifth, twenty-nineteen.  
gapsan-ri, gurye, south korea.  
__10:13 pm._

they sneak into a hotel room on the fourth floor, room D34, limbs aching and bodies exhausted. chaeyoung briefly considers just saying fuck it and sleeping rather than showering, but jihyo's sitting on the sink, tilting her head with dark eyes. she looks tired too, but she smiles nevertheless, "join me and we could get it over with and get straight to bed."  
  
"join you?" chaeyoung raises an eyebrow, looking up from the pillow she had buried her face into. 

"yeah, love, couldn't hear me the first time?"  
  
"uh, no," she pauses, sitting up on the bed. she feels heat rush to her face, but she shrugs it away with a soft, "i don't understand what you mean."  
  
jihyo hops off the sink, taking a couple quick strides until she's in front of the bed, facing chaeyoung. she giggles softly, lightly cupping chaeyoung's cheek before her expression goes dark again, "we're both a bit stressed. might as well do something to get rid of it, hm?"  
  
chaeyoung didn't think jihyo would be as soft as she is, pressing her up against the cold shower tiles and pressing her thigh up against her gently with a mumbled, "it's okay if you're fucked up you know."  
  
chaeyoung whines, rocking her hips onto the slick muscle, threading her fingers through jihyo's hair as she nips and sucks at her pale skin, "'s fine if you are, too. l-like it."

"not as bad as you though," jihyo laughs, pushing chaeyoung's thighs further apart with her right hand. she slips a single finger into the younger girl, and chaeyoung kind of really hates how she tears up because she hasn't been touched properly in so fucking long and she knows jihyo isn't gonna hug her or kiss her or anything. maybe chaeyoung is just a toy to jihyo and it's the exact opposite to what chaeyoung planned, "you're pathetic for letting me use you."  
  
chaeyoung really had wanted to use her, really did want to kill the girl after she got somewhere more secure, but she can't because jihyo is warm and she feels a bit like her older home.  
  
even with the burning water searing into her skin, jihyo still smells like honey, and even as she's curling her finger inside chaeyoung, grinding into her thigh, she's still a stranger, one that chaeyoung hopes she'll never become too attached to. she whimpers, gasping as jihyo pushes another into her heat, tears clouding up in her eyes. is this all she is to jihyo though? a stress reliever? she should really stop thinking, but she can't, not when jihyo is biting down into chaeyoung's shoulder and rolling her hips faster, harsh gasps and quieter moans drowning out every possibility of getting her mind to shut up.  
  
"using you too anyways," she mewls, nails digging into jihyo's skin. she's still bruised up and it makes chaeyoung feel sick to her stomach, "lucky i don't kill you."  
  
"maybe i'd like that," she purrs, and curls up once more, the languid pump of her fingers and the lewd noises send chaeyoung over the edge quickly, and she's left shaking alone in the shower while the water drips onto her. "would be better than being around you."  
  
it's been a while since jihyo got out, definitely, because the water is freezing cold and the fog on the mirror is long faded away. she's only been sitting in silence, nails scratching up her thighs and words plaguing her mind. she isn't supposed to feel, why the fuck is she feeling now?  
  
she doesn't even know who the fuck jihyo is, hasn't been with her for long and yet she's done so much shit with the girl.  
  
chaeyoung has never believed in soulmates, maybe platonic soulmates, but anything else? no.   
  
perhaps jihyo could somehow be chaeyoung's soulmate because she feels right with her.  
  
but as she always does, she pushes the thought into the back of her mind and stands up, switching the water off.  
  
she sleeps with her back facing jihyo that night.   
_  
april seventh, twenty-nineteen.  
honggye-ri, sancheong, south korea.  
__2:20 am._

chaeyoung gets into a fight with a man for harassing jihyo and jihyo's pissed at her, but she doesn't really understand why. chaeyoung stood up for jihyo and that's not something she used to do. its been so fucking long since she's done it, but that isn't the point. nothing is the point except jihyo is so much more different than she expected. she isn't supposed to be weak for some stupid girl she just met, isn't supposed to be weak for anyone.   
  
she's walking by herself on the side of the street, lightheaded and heart pounding in her chest. her stomach aches from the punch the man had landed on her, and she's limping because he was much larger than chaeyoung and him twisting her ankle was not something that could leave her unharmed. she kind of wants to cry, and her eyes are stinging from the cold air, and she feels utterly _alone_.   
  
it sucks.   
  
and she's tired.  
  
and she wants to be cared for for once in her life.  
  
but then there's sirens, and chaeyoung panics because she had washed her makeup off in the bathroom where she fought the man and she runs, pain long forgotten in her body as the adrenaline begins to flood through her veins.   
  
she ends up hiding out in a gas station bathroom, throwing up all the contents she had consumed earlier before sitting back and wiping harshly at her teary eyes with the back of her hand. she takes the orange knife out of her pocket, running her fingers along the cold blade carefully before shrugging and pressing it up against her throat. she closes her eyes, takes a deep breath, and drops it.  
_  
april tenth, twenty-nineteen.  
__gasul-ri, gyeongnam, south korea.  
__2:04 pm._

chaeyoung finds herself pushing jihyo up against a wall in another gas station bathroom, this one dirtier and colder, but she can't find it in herself to care as she kisses jihyo roughly, teeth knocking together harshly and then she's pulling away, a slap that she would have loved to deliver harder landing against her dirt covered cheek. jihyo scoffs, glaring at the slightly smaller woman.  
  
"what?"  
  
"was your plan," she continues, snaking her hand into jihyo's jeans awkwardly, "to abandon me?" jihyo gasps into chaeyoung's mouth, knees nearly buckling as chaeyoung presses two fingers against her clit, quick, small circles that aren't meant to be loving already making the pressure in jihyo's stomach rise.  
  
"no," she whines out, bucking her hips into chaeyoung's touch. she's rough, and jihyo guesses she deserves it after what she's done, but she finds herself feeling guilty and sick and it makes her want to die, "jus' couldn't find you."  
  
"shoulda looked harder." she growls, taking jihyo's bottom lip between her teeth and tugging. jihyo comes undone quickly, a soft sob filling the empty bathroom, and then chaeyoung is gone just as quick as she had entered the room.  
  
she's in an aisle of chips and sweets, already holding a few juice bottles and some water, and jihyo scowls when she catches sight of the cigarettes in her little black basket. she thought she had told chaeyoung to cut it out, but apparently not. or maybe chaeyoung just started not giving a fuck.  
  
"chae?"  
  
"what do you want?"

"the cigarettes."   
  
"what about 'em?"  
  
she rolls her eyes before whispering a soft 'nevermind'.   
  
jihyo is quick to fill the car up with a full, hopefully abandoned gas can. it fills it up just enough to get them to maybe hwanggye-ri in a couple days, but she doubts that. and as soon as she restarts the car, chaeyoung is running out, slight limp still in her step that makes jihyo's heart ache a bit, and jumping into the passenger side of the car with rapid yelling coming from the store owner. she catches sight of him using the phone, but she can't dwell on it for long because chaeyoung is gripping her thigh harshly and telling her to just fucking drive.

_april fourteenth, twenty-nineteen.  
hwanggye-ri, yongju-myeon_, _south korea.  
5:59 pm._

they park the car between a couple trees, gathering a spare change of clothes and a towel they had stolen from the hotel in gapsan-ri.  
  
they're at hwanggye-ri falls, a pretty, pretty sight and a much more calming environment after waiting for nearly a month. okay, so maybe not nearly a month, but still. the water smells nice, and chaeyoung is sure jihyo would make fun of her if she said that because what the hell does water even smell like?  
  
"there's no one here," jihyo deadpans, already yanking her shirt off and throwing it down onto a small, moss covered rock.  
  
"so?" chaeyoung has always turned red in the face easily, and she's seen jihyo shirtless several times, but it's different seeing her marked up from chaeyoung herself. it's different because chaeyoung finds herself aching to reach forward and touch jihyo, maybe take her time with the surely older woman. but she can't because jihyo does not love her and chaeyoung doesn't love jihyo and they're on the run for fucks sake.  
  
next is her shoes and socks, and then her jeans, and she's grinning, "so it's more fun." jihyo winks, shivering as she steps foot into the water. it's not deep enough to fully enjoy herself, and there's several rocks that she could probably cut herself on, but she'll worry about that later when she's bleeding and complaining to chaeyoung.  
  
chaeyoung huffs, sitting down by the rock and watching jihyo splash water onto her face. she looks pretty, and chaeyoung hates the butterflies she feels in her stomach when jihyo runs her fingers through her hair absentmindedly. she's still shivering, but she seems to be getting used to the water right about now, making a come hither motion towards chaeyoung, "come on, chae, 's not nearly as bad as it looks. which, from your view, i don't really think it's bad at all, right?"  
  
she's teasing chaeyoung, and she hates how jihyo knows she has some kind of effect on her.  
  
"just trying to get me naked, aren't you?" she returns, smiling when jihyo nods, shrugging nonchalantly.  
  
"not my fault you're pretty."   
  
chaeyoung slips on a rock getting into the water, leading to a scraped knee and bleeding that won't stop for about fifteen minutes.  
  
and jihyo kisses the new cut, making a face at the blood that rests on her lips. she goes to wipe it off in the water because it's fucking gross, but then she catches chaeyoung staring at her, and she really can't help but run her tongue over it before humming, "that should make it stop."  
  
chaeyoung rolls her eyes, fake gagging and pushing jihyo softly. dipping her knee into the water and hissing at the sting. she can't let it rest too long though because jihyo is grabbing her hand and tugging her towards the waterfall.   
  
chaeyoung finds it kind of romantic that jihyo fucks her up against some more rocks behind the waterfall. 

_april fourteenth, twenty-nineteen.  
jangjeon-ri, yongju-myeon_, _south korea._  
_7:23 pm._  
  
jangjeon is pretty and busy and it makes her nervous because so many people could know who they are, but jihyo's grabbing her hand and intertwining their fingers and chaeyoung's heart leaps out of her chest.  
  
the street lights are pretty, and she finds a small girl crying by one of them while holding a stuffed bunny and she looks so vulnerable that chaeyoung doesn't even try stopping herself from letting go of jihyo's hand and getting down onto one knee to look at the girl, "hey, kid, are you okay?"  
  
she shakes her head, sniffling once, twice, and then clutching the stuffie to her chest tighter. chaeyoung hesitantly reaches out, wiping the child's tears away with the back of her hand, "where's your mommy?"  
  
"dunno," she whimpers, "said was at the bunny store."  
  
chaeyoung thinks that could mean a toy store, so she turns to jihyo, asking if she saw one coming up the street. the girl curls into herself the best she can as she holds onto chaeyoung and jihyo's hands.

the girl's mom is a pretty brunette named jeongyeon. she had apologized profusely before scooping the smaller girl into her arms with a soft explanation that she had left her with her other mother. chaeyoung made a face, nearly opened her mouth and cursed the girl out for leaving her daughter with such an irresponsible woman, but jihyo grabbed onto her hip, digging her nails in as a warning.  
  
jeongyeon could easily tell what she was about to say, chaeyoung will never understand how, but she did, and she was so quick to inform them that nayeon (that was her other mother) was prone to forgetting that she had a child due to dissociative amnesia and that it was in fact jeongyeon's fault for leaving her daughter with her.   
  
chaeyoung still doesn't forgive her, but she's happy the little girl's safe.  
  
by about 7:40, jihyo and chaeyoung sit down outside of a fairly busy restaurant, the cooler air somehow calming to them despite causing them to shiver constantly. it's the most rest they've gotten since they started running, and most definitely the longest chaeyoung's personally ever been able to relax.   
  
jihyo makes things easier somehow.  
  
she makes chaeyoung forget about getting caught, makes her just live in the moment and stop worrying.   
  
she kind of hopes she does the same to jihyo.  
  
jihyo drinks from her glass of bokbunja-ju, each small sip making chaeyoung a little more antsy because she doesn't fucking like alcohol, but jihyo does, and maybe she's a little afraid something's gonna happen again. nothing good ever comes from alcohol.  
  
"i thought you wouldn't drink again," chaeyoung frowns, ignoring the chatter from the loud table next to them. jihyo scrunches her nose.  
  
"thought you said you wouldn't smoke again,"  
  
"fair." she says, taking a longer drink from her strawberry lemonade.  
  
"you should try it, my lovely," chaeyoung's heart fucking _clenches_, but whatever. "it's sweeter than your typical alcohol. leaves a pretty taste on your lips."  
  
"it's alcohol."  
  
"yeah? i had no clue," she chuckles, sarcasm dripping from her low voice and chaeyoung wants to slap her again. but she briefly considers it because it's jihyo. "so?"  
  
"lemme try."   
  
jihyo wraps her hands around the glass, tilting it towards chaeyoung's lips carefully, and the first couple of seconds the alcohol begins to pour into her mouth, she nearly spits it back out. it is sweet, even smells sweeter than the alcohol her dad drunk, but the taste is foreign and she kind of really does not like it. she nearly chokes, pushing the glass away as gently as she can, some of the sticky liquid dripping down her chin and neck. she swallows reluctantly, tongue poking out to lick at her lips as she reaches for a napkin. jihyo shakes her head, a soft but strict 'no' keeping her in place.   
  
she takes a look around before smirking smugly and standing up, making her way over to chaeyoung's side. she takes her chin between two fingers. tilting her head up and placing a small kiss to her mouth, tongue running along her bottom lip to collect more of the liquid. she doesn't stop her, placing kisses down her chin and down her neck, tongue occasionally licking and teeth sometimes nipping and chaeyoung finds herself squirming. her cheeks are hot because there's probably so many people looking at them, but then jihyo's fingers are threading through her hair and tugging her back, still peppering kisses along her pale skin. she doesn't stop until chaeyoung whines, all thready and high-pitched and she's satisfied.  
  
she sits back in the white chair, licking her lips while keep eye contact with chaeyoung. she couldn't care less about all the stares she's currently getting, and chaeyoung finds it so fucking attractive she almost considers throwing herself into jihyo's lap.

_april eighteenth, twenty-nineteen.  
hapcheon-eup, hapcheon_, _south korea._  
_12:00 pm._  
  
chaeyoung figures she should return the favour, so she sits in the car, door open and feet propped up against the open window, taking a long drag from the cigarette between her lips. jihyo groans, going to stand up and get as far away from chaeyoung as she can, but then chaeyoung's grabbing her arm, and shaking her head this time.  
  
"wanna try?"  
  
"fuck no i don't, it's disgusting!" except she doesn't pull away and chaeyoung's the one smirking now. jihyo hates how she knows she should make it up to chaeyoung, "how do i know you haven't done anything to it, huh? didn't poison it or fill it with some other fucking substance."

"because i'm literally smoking it, dumbass. just one drag. that's it, never again. just like how i took one drink from the bokbunja-ri or whatever."  
  
"bokbunja-ju," she corrects, pouting, "how do you do it?"  
  
"you want me to help you?" she nods, and she looks kind of vulnerable for only the second time chaeyoung's seen since she met her. she smiles, dropping her feet back down onto the floorboard and twisting her upper body to cup at jihyo's cheek. she runs her thumb along her cheek gently, taking the cigarette from between her lips with the other before tugging her bottom lip down, "part them for me."  
  
she rests it between them properly (there is no proper way, but chaeyoung prefers this way), telling her to suck softly. and jihyo does just that, up until chaeyoung lightly tugs it away and then she's sputtering and grimacing, "that's fucking gross."  
  
"yeah? tell that to your dumb alcohol." chaeyoung laughs, keeping the cigarette rested between her fingers. she gets an idea, one that she really doesn't think jihyo's gonna agree to, but she's curious, and it would mark her in more ways than one, "wanna try somethin' else for me?"  
  
jihyo takes another deep breath in before nodding.   
  
chaeyoung wonders what kind of fucked up relationship they have now.

_she presses the cigarette to jihyo's thigh as gently as she can, lightly kissing the girl's neck in a small attempt to distract her from the pain. jihyo hisses, squirming and tightening her grip on chaeyoung's arm before she pulls away, mumbling apologies.   
  
jihyo ends up angry, but if chaeyoung lets her use her body, she'll forgive her._

_april eighteenth, twenty-nineteen.  
???, goryeong_, _south korea._  
_4:41 am._

chaeyoung knows she can't keep letting jihyo get this close to her. she knows she needs to stop jihyo from getting any closer because if she does, she'll make chaeyoung weak and that's the last thing the nineteen year old needs.  
  
so she stares at the knife in her hands again, glancing back and forth between it and jihyo's sleeping body in the hotel bed. it would be so easy to just kill her and continue running. no one would ever have to know it was even chaeyoung. 

no one but herself, and she doesn't think she could live with the thought of killing an innocent person.  
  
she derides, the contradicting thought easing into her mind.  
  
_innocent my ass._

but jihyo is jihyo and chaeyoung can't get off free with her.  
  
_april nineteenth, twenty-nineteen.  
dalseong-gun, south korea.  
10:30 AM._  
  
chaeyoung comes up with an idea.   
  
it won't be good for either of them, but she'll be able to forget quite easily.  
  
they're fairly close to daegu, and chaeyoung decides that that's where she'll stop. maybe at seo-gu, maybe jung-gu.   
  
she kisses jihyo again, even kisses the burn mark on her thigh, and softly mumbles as she's lying next to her that night, "d'you believe in love?"  
  
jihyo stays silent for a while before clearing her throat, "depends."  
  
"do you think you could have loved me in some other life?"  
  
it's a heavy question, one that lingers in the air for much longer than necessary. chaeyoung finds herself nervous, palms sweaty and limbs trembling as she recites her words over and over in her head. jihyo turns to her side, reaching out to cup chaeyoung's cheek, "honestly?"  
  
chaeyoung nods. she doesn't want to be lied to anymore after all.  
  
"nah." jihyo laughs, turning back onto her back and chaeyoung hates how her heart feels like it breaks a little. but it's good. this should make things easier.

"just nah?" chaeyoung ignores how her voice breaks. maybe she was never lovable and that's why no one's ever wanted her. just maybe.  
  
"yeah. just nah," chaeyoung sits up, staring back down at jihyo. and jihyo isn't fucking dumb contrary to chaeyoung's believe, so she quickly picks up on the change in the atmosphere, "what, you weren't joking?"  
  
"uh, yeah. i was joking. it's dumb, isn't it?"   
  
"depends."  
  
"can i tell you something, ji?" she nods, sitting up and scooting just a little closer to chaeyoung. she takes her hand between two of hers, lightly brushing over her bruised knuckles with her thumb, "my name's son chaeyoung."  
  
"i know." jihyo deadpans, chuckling. "and i'm park jihyo. but i'm sure you've figured that out already. why'd you do it?"  
  
"alcohol's all." jihyo raises both eyebrows, shock evident on her face, and chaeyoung continues, "you're not scared of me?" she asks, then, all quiet and low.  
  
"why would i be? you're just a scared little girl who wants to be loved," jihyo frowns, and chaeyoung almost sees some empathy still there, "but i cannot do that."  
  
chaeyoung hopes that new life comes sooner than later.  
  
_april twenty-first, twenty-nineteen.  
dalseo-gu, daegu, south korea.  
???_

two police men have chaeyoung pinned up against the hood of their car, hands grabbing and pinching at places they shouldn't be, and heavy bodies pinning her roughly and pushing much harder than necessary. one man smells of marijuana and the other smells of bokbunja-ju and chaeyoung nearly throws up everything she's eaten that day onto the hood of their car.   
  
jihyo's smiling at her, not even fighting back against the woman holding her hands behind her back. they haven't handcuffed chaeyoung just yet, and briefly thinks she could escape if she's quick enough, but daegu is a big city and there's so many fucking cops she doesn't think she'll make it out of here safe.   
  
"got anything that'll hurt me on you?" one says, and he sounds so much like a little prepubescent boy it makes chaeyoung chuckle.  
  
"you're the one feeling me up, you tell me."  
  
"watch your tone with me or i'll have you in the back-"  
  
"fuck you." she twists, throwing her shoulder to the right and hooking her left leg under one man's knee just as she did in nongok-ri. he trips easily, grip loosening as his head knocks against the other officer's roughly, and then jihyo's throwing her own head back, slamming against the front of the female's nose. chaeyoung grabs a gun that had conveniently slid from a man's open holster, before loading it and grabbing jihyo's arm. she keeps jihyo in front of her, every now and then glancing back to make sure they weren't too close.  
  
she guides jihyo through a small alley, so small that it can barely fit the both of them in it. it has a dead end, and the sirens are getting louder, and if they don't fucking climb the ladder, they'll end up caught. chaeyoung swears under her breath, roughly grabbing jihyo and jamming her hand into the front of her jacket pocket to find a bobby pin. she rounds the bends, slipping the angled end into the hole as quickly as she can. her hands are shaking and her fingers aren't keeping the pin where exactly she needs it, and she can find herself losing patience.  
  
she hears a car door shut, the sirens now blaring, and she finally pushes it down firmly, rotating it into the slot for the fifth time, and the handcuffs come undone. she ushers jihyo up first, quickly following behind.  
  
the ladder is loud, creaking and shaking and slamming up against the building as the wind blows harder. a single step breaks beneath jihyo and she slips, hands desperately scrambling to regain hold of the old ladder. chaeyoung feels as if she can't breathe when she hears the police shouting and then the loud shake of the ladder being stepped upon once again. she looks back, tears brimming in her eyes from the cold, violent air. jihyo steps onto the ledge, turning around and grabbing chaeyoung's arm to tug her up faster, and honestly?  
  
she doesn't even know why she's still running at this point because they're both fucked.  
  
"you have a gun, don't you?" jihyo asks, voice shaky and weak. she's crying, and chaeyoung hates the lump in her throat that forms from the sight. she nods, reaching into the pocket and pulling out the small glock 19, "shoot them, what the fuck are you doing?"  
  
"i can't shoot them!" chaeyoung sniffles, wiping at her eyes angrily.  
  
"funny, you can stab your dad, but you can't shoot a few cops," jihyo's pushing her again, she can tell by the way she stares at her all strict and mean, "do it or we'll both end up caught, chaeyoung."  
  
she shakes her head, taking a step towards the front of the building. there's several cars zooming by, like little blurry dots, and there's no other way to get down from here from what she can see. she feels guilty again, feels so much rushing back to her and she wonders why now of all times she wants to start feeling everything again.  
  
no one's gonna want her, no one's gonna need her now. she's never been wanted, never been needed, was always a bad influence on everyone. mostly jeonghoon, but she's sure he wants nothing to do with her now. if she can't even have her little brother, what's the point?   
  
jihyo never wanted chaeyoung really. she just didn't want to be alone. and chaeyoung didn't either, so she's fine with it. but it hurts, and she's so tired of running. she grabs the front of jihyo's shirt, tugging her into her body for a harsh kiss, and she's sure she tastes blood on the tip of her tongue, but she won't have to worry about that later. she pushes jihyo away, handing her the orange knife before ignoring every feeling that continues to rush through her veins. it burns her insides, threatening to burst over and flood every single thing she's ever touched and ruined, and she hates it so much.  
  
she points the gun at jihyo, firing once, twice, and then a soft, "like i said, do not fuck with me."  
  
she hates the way jihyo sounds sobbing, hates the way jihyo clutches at her stomach rather than her shoulder because she knows it hurts more. chaeyoung hates herself at this point, but if she can get jihyo away, she'll be safer. she drops the gun by jihyo, cupping her cheek for the last time and placing a soft kiss to her forehead. she wipes her tears, straightens and turns on her heels to step up on the ledge. she waits, counts each long second before the first cop makes it up the ladder and grabs ahold of jihyo, whispering a soft 'fuck'.  
  
she gets off free, letting gravity drag her body down into the pretty blurs of colours.

**Author's Note:**

> main twt: kyotojeon  
side twt: yeologlst with an l


End file.
